Dear Online Diary,

Hello Friends. Hello Internet. How are you today? I'm fine. Maybe a little hungry.

This is my first ever web log post. It is also my first blog post. "Web log" and "blog" are the same thing. The word "Blog" is an abbreviation. Is "blog" a word? It could be, but I must say that it stinks of slang to high heaven. Slang scares me.

I learned about "web blogs" yesterday. I was at Comerica Park because I work there. I got to work early and was walking around the outfield (I can't stand the clubhouse due to Mr. Leyland's second hand smoke. YUCK!). Anywhoo, I was walking and a fan said "Hey Curtis, nice blog". What a nutball comment! I don't have a blog. I didn't even know what a blog was. Intrigued, I asked in a cordial, polite, cordial manner "What's a blog?". The fan laughed and said "You should know. You have one on Espn.com". The fan and I stood around for 10-15 seconds, a very good time period for awkward standing around, and I went to check the interweb. LOLZIEZ! Interweb is a funny phrase. I think I heard it on "The Simpsons". I hear lots of funny stuff on "The Simpsons". AY CARAMBA!

I heard a Simpsons movie came out. I would like to see it. Does anyone know of any movie theatres in the Detroit area?

Sure enough, a blog (LOLZIEZ) was up on Espn.com under the name Curtis Granderson. I read through the racy, controversial, offensive blog with one thought going through my head. "Who the heck is Aunt Bobbie? I don't have an Aunt Bobbie. I must not have written this." I guess this is what people mean when they say "Identity Theft". I wonder if this Aunt Bobbie had her identity stolen.

ANYWHOO...

In order to set the record straight about my life, team, and opinions I've decided to blog honestly and candidly about the Curtis Granderson experience. Welcome to the roller coaster people. Buckle up and let's ride!

-Curtis